Thursday, 18 December 2008

I wish to complain

I am appalled by the increasing use of harassment in tbe work-place. The other day a file of papers was dropped upon my desk. The unexpected noise deeply disturbed my concentration and disrupted a crucial scheduled meeting with high-powered executives from IBM’s Institute of Electronic Government. The culprit will be duly punished. My wife has also been seriously harassed by postmen knocking too hard upon the door of the Old Barn. I will not tolerate anti-social knocking, there is a time and a place for everything. I complained to my good friend Lord Mandelson and I am pleased to report that he has now accepted the wisdom of my remarks and intends to privatise Royal Mail. This proves my thesis – the only way to maintain order is to keep on making complaints. And if anyone (and I seriously mean anyone) should dare complain about me and my conduct to the official professional body then I undertake to complain about them in even stronger terms. The difference is that I will win. Right is on my side. I have friends in very high places. I hope that is fully understood.